General Chitchat for October

cindigirl wrote:Don't think we're related. LOL I meant our in-laws seem to be of the same mentality.

I won't go into detail of what I think of them. I am a Christian.

LOL

The weird part is I actually get along with MIL. FIL is the one that's a complete b@stard. That sounds harsh but I really don't know what to call someone who screws over their own son and his family to the tune of $75,000 and won't even take the blame or apologize when confronted with the truth. Needless to say, I haven't spoken to him in almost 3 years.

Did anybody hear that Amanda Knox was aquitted in Italy today?

I was so happy when I heard this.

I know this is off topic, but I just wanted to share this beautiful poem.


A BETTER TOMORROW

Author: Yvonne Warren

I never knew there would be a better tomorrow But you've come into my life and taken away all my sorrow

My days of sadness are a thing of the past Because I have found true love at last

My days of emptiness are gone for good Because you fill a void in my heart that you should

You've opened a window You've shown me the light And my love for you will continue to burn bright.

nnz, not off topic at all. This is the general chitchat thread so it's for anything non-George. That was a lovely poem, beautiful sentiment.

Yes, cindi, saw video on Gossip Cop. Was really great and while I had hoped for it, I really thought it would go the other way. She went through such hell. Glad it's over.

Early morning jokes:

[b]How Italians take care of business.

Facts about The killing of Osama Bin Laden:

1) Fugitive for 19 years. Hunted by Saudi Arabia , Interpol , Scotland Yard, Mossad, and the CIA.

2) CIA was looking for him for last 14 years. Found him twice and lost him twice. Cost $1.8 Billion

3) CIA had 4 directors over this time period, 1997- 2011. All failed to capture Bin Laden.

4) Obama appoints Leon Panetta son of Italian immigrants as new CIA director April 28th, 2011

5) Mr. Panetta calls in a few favors from friends in New York , New Jersey and Las Vegas on April 29th 2011.

6) They plan a raid over some espresso and cannolis on April 30th, 2011. Decide to dress as Navy Seals.

7) Bin Laden is killed (not captured or held for trial) and the body is dumped at sea May 1, 2011. (also known as “swimming with the fishes” in Italian folklore)

Job done in less then 100 hours: Reward $25,000,000

9) Estimated savings of not having a trial $200,000,000.

10) Political favor handed out: Fiat 500’s go on sale in North America this month.

That’s taking care of business![b]

Patty, did you get the PM I sent you yesterday?

Cindi, there's nothing in my box. Send it again, please.

OK Please let me know if you get it.

Will do. Talk to you soon.

Got PM and replied, cindi.

nnz wrote:I know this is off topic, but I just wanted to share this beautiful poem.


A BETTER TOMORROW

Author: Yvonne Warren

I never knew there would be a better tomorrow But you've come into my life and taken away all my sorrow

My days of sadness are a thing of the past Because I have found true love at last

My days of emptiness are gone for good Because you fill a void in my heart that you should

You've opened a window You've shown me the light And my love for you will continue to burn bright.

moltomolto bella!


(about Amanda Knox
dunno very much
dunno if innocent or not
but guess for the guilt side

anyway wot I just found was

http://www.tradingonlinefree.it/amanda-knox-un-affare-milionario-4510.html

dollars
millions
for her story

....
so sad)

If anyone wants to read the It's me post in English, what you have to do is highlight text and right click on Bing translation.

I'm very, very happy she got acquitted. Not sure if she got off because she's cute and American but I just have a gut feeling she's innocent. IMO And, oh yes, she will make a bundle of money from her story.

money from a murder
even if for making people to better know....
hmmm
it's upsetting
IMO

(sorry, sometimes my Italianity slips in! )

cindigirl wrote:If anyone wants to read the It's me post in English, what you have to do is highlight text and right click on Bing translation.

I'm very, very happy she got acquitted. Not sure if she got off because she's cute and American but I just have a gut feeling she's innocent. IMO And, oh yes, she will make a bundle of money from her story.

I would think being an American would go against her, not for her since she's in another country. I read a lot about the trial over the weekend and I'm also glad she has been acquitted. The evidence was pretty circumstantial.

I agree that the evidence is circumstantial & not enough to convict. I still can't get behind her 100% though. There's just something about her that I don't trust, just a gut feeling. I don't think she actually committed the murder but maybe she knows more than she let's on. IMO

Either way, the investigation was f'ed up from the beginning so hopefully they learn something from that and keep it from happening again.

Here's a senior joke

Jacob, age 92, and Rebecca, age 89, living in Miami , are all excited about their decision to get married. They go for a stroll to discuss the wedding, and on the way they pass a drugstore.. Jacob suggests they go in.

Jacob addresses the man behind the counter:

"Are you the owner?"
The pharmacist answers, "Yes."
Jacob: Do you sell heart medication?"
Pharmacist: "Of course, we do."
Jacob: "How about medicine for circulation?"
Pharmacist: "All kinds."
Jacob: "Medicine for rheumatism?"
Pharmacist: "Definitely."
Jacob: "How about suppositories?"
Pharmacist: "You bet!"
Jacob: "Medicine for memory problems, arthritis and Alzheimer's?"
Pharmacist: "Yes, a large variety. The works."
Jacob: "What about vitamins, sleeping pills, Geritol, antidotes for Parkinson's disease?"
Pharmacist: "Absolutely."
Jacob: "Everything for heartburn and indigestion?"
Pharmacist: "We sure do."
Jacob: "You sell wheelchairs and walkers and canes?"
Pharmacist: "All speeds and sizes."
Jacob: "Adult diapers?"
Pharmacist: "Sure."

Jacob: "We'd like to use this store as our Bridal Registry."

HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Slow news day today. Here's another joke:

I Owe My Mother....
1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning."
2. My mother taught me RELIGION
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet."
3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!"
4. My mother taught me LOGIC
"Because I said so, that's why."
5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."
6. My mother taught me FORESIGHT
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident."
7. My mother taught me IRONY
"Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry about."
8. My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS
"Shut your mouth and eat your supper."
9. My mother taught me about CONTORTION-ISM
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"
10. My mother taught me about STAMINA
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."
11. My mother taught me about WEATHER
"This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it."
12. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"
13. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE
"I brought you into this world, and I can take you out."
14. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION
"Stop acting like your father!"
15. My mother taught me about ENVY
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do."
16. My mother taught me about ANTICIPATION
"Just wait until we get home."
17. My mother taught me about RECEIVING
"You are going to get it when you get home!"
18. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE
"If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to get stuck that way."
19. My mother taught me ESP
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"
20. My mother taught me HUMOR
"When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."
21. My mother taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."
22. My mother taught me GENETICS
"You're just like your father."
23. My mother taught me about my ROOTS
"Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?"
24. My mother taught me WISDOM
"When you get to be my age, you'll understand."
And my favorite:
25. My mother taught me about JUSTICE
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

this is the best


"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

Hi patty, did you turn on the TV? There was a terrible helicopter crash into the river in New York today at 3:30. It's all over the news.

One person was killed and the other 2 in critical condition - the pilot was OK. They were tourists from England and Australia.

its me, I say to my kids " hope you have 10 just like you " .
Sorry to hear about the crash, yesterday we had that big chemical plant fire. The plant is only about 10 miles from my home, it was an all day event, school, nursing homes, etc. having to evacuate, then the worry over toxins in the air and water.

lucy - not a good today all around. Hope you and you family are OK.

Hi cindi, grandkids were over for weekly visit. Grandson was glued to TV watching the breaking news. Gave us a running commentary. Next thing I know both grandsons run downstairs and go into toybox and drag out 2 plastic helicopters and start playing crash in river.

What am I doing this week end ?
There’s this exhibition near my place “Ron Galella boxing with the stars”. I’ve just read about it, didn’t know him before but apparently he’s a legend among paparazzi (his awards include loosing 5 teeth in a fight with Marlon Brando, followed him with a helmet after that ! and 2 trials with Jackie Kennedy Onassis).
I’ve checked his pics and some are awesome black and white
http://www.google.fr/images?sourceid=navclient&aq=3h&oq=&hl=fr&ie=UTF-8&rlz=1T4RNRN_frFR426FR426&q=ron+galella&oi=image_result_group&sa=X
They certainly look like classic old Hollywood, though of course at the end of the day he’s just a paparazzi (but they didn’t get better with time).
He’s also apparently the author of some of George’s good oldies (mullet and tartan effect) http://l.yimg.com/ea/img/-/110909/mullet_georgeclooney_176j5qd-176j5t5.jpg?x=400&q=80&n=1&sig=fYXdlqRu8yB40rJ8Y_SXEQ--
probably not his best LOL… not sure it’s gonna figure in the exhibition
I’ll try to go over Saturday (the Pacino and the Redford pics I found really nice)

I know it's late in the year for this, but just got this interesting bit of trivia.



> Hey, you never know....
>
>
> >> Chinese numerology and Feng Shui for 2011 This year we are going
> >> to experience four unusual dates: 1/1/11, 1/11/11, 11/1/11,
> >> 11/11/11, and that's not all; Take the last two digits of the
> >> year you were born and the age you will be this year and the
> >> result will add up to 111 for everyone!!!! This is the year of
> >> MONEY. Also, this year, October will have 5 Sundays, 5 Mondays &
> >> 5 Saturdays. This happens only once every 823 years. These
> >> particular years are known as Moneybag years. Good luck everyone

Good luck!! we all need a bit of luck, from time to time!

pattygirl wrote:Take the last two digits of the year you were born and the age you will be this year and the
> >> result will add up to 111 for everyone!!!!

Thast's amazing patty. You have to give it to the Chinese.

Lol @ the mom jokes, Cindi.

That's weird, my daughter just had to read a story about the Chinese new year last night. Oh speaking of her schoolwork, remember me bitching about how 3rd grade math is killing me because they have changed the way they do it? I kid you not, twice in the past week her math worksheets have had the word ALGEBRA on it. In 3rd-frigging-grade! WTH?!?

They're teaching the youngster earlier and earlier nowadays. There was a news story recently that parents are teaching new language skills while they're still babies.

Hell, I need to go back to school to re-learn all this crap. I took Honors classes in high school, so I'm pretty sure that I'm not stupid. I told her the other day that I thought one of the word problems was a trick question. LMAO

Here's another funny. A friend on FB posted it. I love Betty White! LMAO

OMG that is sooooo sunny. You gotta love Betty White.

She's a hoot. Actually all of the Golden Girls were. My daughter and I watch the reruns sometimes when there's nothing else on at night.

Here's another funny I got by email earlier:

Marriage is like a deck of cards, in the beginning all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you wish you had a F-ing club and a spade.

MyGirl, love your joke.

Here's another golf joke -

When my doctor asked me about what I did yesterday, I told him about my day:
"Well, yesterday afternoon, I waded across the edge of a lake, escaped from a mountain lion in the heavy brush, marched up and down a mountain, stood in a patch of poison ivy, crawled out of quicksand, and jumped away from an aggressive rattlesnake"

Inspired by my story, the doctor said, "You must be an awesome outdoorsman!"

"No," I replied, "I'm just a shitty golfer."

Good form, girls. Made my day.

I love Betty White! She's so right.

Great jokes ladies. Especially the cards one.

I agree!

cindigirl wrote:MyGirl, love your joke.

Here's another golf joke -

When my doctor asked me about what I did yesterday, I told him about my day:
"Well, yesterday afternoon, I waded across the edge of a lake, escaped from a mountain lion in the heavy brush, marched up and down a mountain, stood in a patch of poison ivy, crawled out of quicksand, and jumped away from an aggressive rattlesnake"

Inspired by my story, the doctor said, "You must be an awesome outdoorsman!"

"No," I replied, "I'm just a shitty golfer."

Thank you for this one, Cindigirl )

Management Skills

Take the present five minutes management course and see your skill.

Lesson 1:
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her
shower, when the doorbell rings.
The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs.
When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbor.
Before she says a word, Bob says, 'I'll give you $800 to drop that towel.'
After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands
naked in front of Bob, after a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 and
leaves.

The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs.

When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, 'Who was that?'
'It was Bob the next door neighbor,' she replies.
'Great,' the husband says, 'did he say anything about the $800 he owes me?'

Moral of the story:
If you share critical information pertaining to credit and risk with
your shareholders in time, you may be in a position to prevent
avoidable exposure.

Lesson 2:
A priest offered a Nun a lift.
She got in an do crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg.

The priest nearly had an accident.
After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg.
The nun said, 'Father, remember Psalm 129?'
The priest removed his hand. But, changing gears, he let his hand
slide up her leg again.
The nun once again said, 'Father, remember Psalm 129?'

The priest apologized 'Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.'
Arriving at the convent, the nun sighed heavily and went on her way.
On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129.
It said, 'Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.'

Moral of the story:
If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity.

Lesson 3:
A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to
lunch when they find an antique oil lamp.
They rub it and a Genie comes out.
The Genie says, 'I'll give each of you just one wish.'

'Me first! Me first!' says the admin clerk. 'I want to be in the
Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.'
Puff! She's gone.

'Me next! Me next!' says the sales rep. 'I want to be in Hawaii ,
relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of
Pina Coladas and the love of my life.'
Puff! He's gone.



'OK, you're up,' the Genie says to the manager.

The manager says, 'I want those two back in the office after lunch.'

Moral of the story:
Always let your boss have the first say.

Lesson 4
An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing.
A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, 'Can I also sit like you
and do nothing?'
The eagle answered: 'Sure, why not.'
So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a
sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story:
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.



Lesson 5
A turkey was chatting with a bull.

'I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree' sighed the
turkey, 'but I haven't got the energy.'
'Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?' replied the
bull. They're packed with nutrients.'

The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him
enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree.

The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.
Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the
top of the tree.
He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.

Moral of the story:
Bull Shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there..

Lesson 6

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird
froze and fell to the ground into a large field.

While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him.

As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to
realize how warm he was.
The dung was actually thawing him out!
He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.
A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.
Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow
dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.
Morals of the story:

(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
(3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

THUS ENDS THE FIVE MINUTE MANAGEMENT COURSE And send this to five
bright people who have enough sense of humor to take it!?

Betty White is so funny and out of all the Golden Girls she was the most naughty sadly I think all the others except Rue and Bette are gone now. Or did Rue go too? I can't remember I will have to have a look. It amazes me how much Betty has had a career burst this late in life! Love the jokes by the way. I don't actually really know anyone I forget them as soon as I have had a laugh.

Rue died last year.

In case anybody is interested, George is going to be on the Regis and Kelly show at 9:00 a.m. today. (About 5 minutes from now.)

Just looked at the stats for this site. Amazing that there are more "Guests" on right now than there are registered users.

Come on you scardy cats - register and join the fun.

Why do the registered users have to do all the work here? We don't bite - much. Brahahaha!

George on Regis and Kelly - He talked about IOM of course and also talked about the David Gergen Como visit where David jumped into the lake in his "skivvies." G said he hasn't heard the word skivvies for a long time but he himself was dressed. The show is live and I wonder how G managed to get up so early since he was probably up late last night. They asked him how he is managing turning 50 and said it's better than the alternative. (His standard answer). LOL

He said he's going to Paris and London next week for a film. That man really gets around and not a trace of jet lag.

I don't know how he maintains his good humor and personality with so much traveling. I'd be hell to deal with until I got some rest.

Getting ready to watch the Letterman recording.

He's always said that he doesn't need much sleep. Probably didn't stay too long at the party. As far as jetlag is concerned, "veteran" flyers usually don't have much of it. There are ways to get around it. Usually, they'll put themselves into the time zone of destination mode. They'll go to sleep as soon as they get on plane, so that when they get there, they're in the same space as natives.

Was a great interview, better that last night on Letterman's show.

patty, check your pm please.

Done, and replied.

Replied to you.

I don't like George enough to have to put up with listening to Kelly. She creeps me out.

foretunately Kelly didn't do that much talking, Regis did most of it.