George Clooney never wants to let a woman get her hands on his ass(ets)

Yet another “Why George Clooney dumped Elisabetta” story! This one involves the words “tight” and “fist”. Gross. So, we’ve already heard how Clooney dumped Elisabetta because she drove him nuts and they were leading separate lives anyway. Then we heard about how Clooney dumped Eli because he’s totally NOT gay, and never fake dates, but he probably does make his girlfriends sign “golden gagging clauses” (I’m sure those clauses involve “tight” and… gross). And I think the last thing we heard was about Clooney dumping Eli because she’s a famewhore who would do anything in front of a camera? We get it, Team Clooney. He dumped her. She deserved it. Enough!

But it’s not enough! Mike Walker over at The Enquirer claims that the real (super-REAL!) reason that Cloons dumped Cans was just because he’s tight-fisted (gross?)… WITH MONEY. It seems Clooney is fine with “taking care” of a girl financially, but he’s never going to let a woman get near his ass(ets).

George Clooney never intended to marry Elisabetta Canalis, or any woman EVER because he’s too tight-fisted! Revealed a close Clooney pal: “What terrifies George is losing any of his hard-earned fortune - estimated at $160 million! He’s extremely generous while he’s in a relationship, but the thought of losing even part of his fortune in a divorce settlement sickens him. George doesn’t even believe in prenups, because there’s usually a legal loophole. His ideal partner would be a woman who’s happy sharing his life without sharing her name on HIS bankbook.”

[From The Enquirer, print edition]

I think there a lot of men like this, especially when you’re talking about a man who grew up with very little and made his money later in life. I mean, think about it: Clooney only started rolling in dough when he was well into his 30s. I don’t blame him for wanting to protect his ass and his assets, but at the end of day, I can’t help but think that his personal priorities are somewhat skewed. You can’t take it with you, you know. Whoever dies with the most doesn’t win. (I say, side-eyeing Clooney’s bankbook)

I guess George is indeed on the “tight” side.

cindigirl wrote:I find it hard to believe George would make a woman pay for his dinner. After all, this is a man who once left a $100 tip to the waiter.

socimar wrote:I seems to recall a year or so ago, during an interview with a magazine (was it Vogue??) Eli said that she preferred American men to Italians because they are not scared to tell you “I love you”; however, she added, they are a little stingy and I often have to pay for dinner (Italian men would rather die that make a woman pay for a dinner). I guess George is indeed on the “tight” side.

cindigirl wrote:The American man is more open with his feelings, but at a dinner he makes you pay the bill or is divided in two.

Well, Socimar, if Clooney is the American man I guess you proved me wrong. My bad.

The “real” reason George Clooney won’t get married

Jul 15, 2011

The National Enquirer claims it has cracked the secret code behind the actor’s commitment phobia.

It’s one of those mysteries that has grabbed our collective attention by the short and curlies and refuses to let go. Just like the whereabouts of Jimmy Hoffa’s body, who really killed JFK, and how it’s humanly possible for a man to be as handsome as Jon Hamm, we spend agonized, sleepless nights wondering why George Clooney will never walk down the aisle again.

Well, The National Enquirer thinks they’ve solved the mystery once and for all. Can you handle the truth?

“George Clooney never intended to marry Elisabetta Canalis, or any woman EVER because he’s too tight-fisted! Revealed a close Clooney pal: ‘What terrifies George is losing any of his hard-earned fortune — estimated at $160 million! He’s extremely generous while he’s in a relationship, but the thought of losing even part of his fortune in a divorce settlement sickens him. George doesn’t even believe in prenups, because there’s usually a legal loophole. His ideal partner would be a woman who’s happy sharing his life without sharing her name on HIS bankbook.’” [The Enquirer via Celebitchy.]

There you have it. It has nothing to do with his short attention span for hot, vacuous brunettes. And don’t even think about bringing up those gay rumours. The real reason Gorgeous George will never put a ring on it, folks, is that he simply loves his bank account more.

I can understand that for the rich and famous, you’re always going to wonder if the person you’re with loves you for the fame and fortune, or for your fragile inner self. But in George’s case, I’d say he has enough desirable qualities outside of his millions to attract any sentient human being.

This sounds like something planted by the Canalis camp. She’s been surprisingly quiet since the breakup and this could be her way of passive-aggressively fighting back. It makes sense, right? Their breakup has nothing to do with her fame-whoring, or her pressure to get married and have kids. It’s all due to George’s tightwad Scroogey McCheapskate ways. Nice try, EC camp, but this is a tabloid fail.

And so the “truth” eludes us once again; the mystery remains unbroken, set to haunt our dreams for another restless weekend. And all the while, we ignore the niggling voice in our gut, screaming to be heard above our reason as it shouts: "Maybe he just doesn’t want to get married again because he just doesn’t want to get married again!"

lucy wrote:LL, IMO the game playing is a way to avoid commitment.

LornaDoone wrote:Seriously, who cares about his assests? Could I just get my hands on his ass?

Lighterside wrote:

LornaDoone wrote:Seriously, who cares about his assests? Could I just get my hands on his ass?

Ahahahaha Lorna EXACTLY! The rest isn't all that interesting!

Cinderella wrote:Oh, it’s hard for us to find someone we can trust, so George isn’t alone there! But I do hope someday he can find someone to spend quality time with that will compliment/complete him and care for him instead of all the fame and money. It is more enjoyable to spend time with one person and not have to go through the same sorrows every couple of years…

Does she like me for my money… does she like me for my fame… does she want to be my Honey… or is this all a game.

cindigirl wrote:Welcome pattygirl. We're all well aware of and are in awe of the attraction of his mind and how he thinks and processes things. Truthfully, that's the primary reason I and maybe others like him so much.

But sometimes we just like to have a bit of fun with him. I'm pretty sure with his sense of humor he wouldn't mind at all.

MM wrote:

Cinderella wrote:Oh, it’s hard for us to find someone we can trust, so George isn’t alone there! But I do hope someday he can find someone to spend quality time with that will compliment/complete him and care for him instead of all the fame and money. It is more enjoyable to spend time with one person and not have to go through the same sorrows every couple of years…

Does she like me for my money… does she like me for my fame… does she want to be my Honey… or is this all a game.

Cinderella...who is a poet and knows it!!

Lighterside wrote:LMAO I've spent more time looking at this man's crotch, than I would have ever liked to admit!