AmoreMagazine.com's Kate Casey: How to Be George Clooney's Girlfriend

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You are a struggling actress or quasi model trying to break into the American entertainment market. You are an actress who has worked tirelessly to get bit parts in a business built around rejection. These are the kind of women that George Clooney chooses.

Here is the thing about A-List stars. They don't like to share the spotlight. They are used to having handlers who will do whatever they want at their whim. People work around their needs. So you can only imagine how near impossible it would be to survive in a happy relationship with two people who roll with entourages. Some people text their significant other. Imagine having to coordinate your better half's schedule through assistants, managers, and publicists? Can't we just go out for a bowl of spaghetti and make out at home later? Which team will get a car? Will your people make the reservation? Can you make sure my hair and makeup team has access to the home salon? Last time they tried to get buzzed in to the mansion your personal trainer and the dog walker were double parked in front of the guest house. Tonight is my night, so can you agree to pictures inside the premiere but sit out the red carpet? This is the nonsense that goes on.

So is it a wonder that someone like George Clooney would opt for someone who requires less maintenance? A star like Clooney needs arm candy. He needs someone who will show up when needed. She must be beautiful, but not too clingy. It would be helpful if she can hold her own in a conversation about the suffering in Darfur. The last thing he needs is a girl who thinks famine is the name of an album.

As Lainey Gossip reported this week, George refers to his latest as "the girl". "When he’s telling his people - the drivers, the security - how he wants her placed, how she should arrive, etc, he calls her “the girl”.

“Pick the girl up at 8pm and bring her over to the restaurant.”

“The girl is coming through the front tonight.”

“Drop me off, then get the girl and have her brought in the back door.”

She must know right away that the relationship will have a time limit, that the payoff will be a great lifestyle for the duration. Perhaps a chance for them to get some photo opportunities? But he will not get her jobs. She can do that on her own time, once the relationship fizzles. You want a whirlwind trip to Europe, stay at the finest hotels, play pool with Matt Damon, and go yachting with Cindy Crawford? Done. You want a role on How I Met Your Mother? Slow down, my lady.

They have to be careful about how much they express about not only their life, but his. He can't be burning bridges. Take, for example, what his former girlfriend retweeteed about Jennifer Aniston last year:

“sto sfogliando il nuovo Rolling Stone. Iggy Pop in copertina è il sosia di Jennifer Aniston.”

Translation: I’m flipping through the new Rolling Stone. Iggy Pop on the cover is the double of Jennifer Aniston.

This was the picture:

That will not fly.

They will all try. Despite an agreement they will drop hints that suddenly despite being 50, being pretty open about his disinterest in getting married or ever procreating that she is the one. This will frustrate him, because he thought he made it clear.

For a lot of women this would be enough. I can show up to whatever you want. You want to get me a dress, use a hair and makeup team, and wear some jewels? Consider it already done. But these women start to taste the celebrity life and then they start to consider themselves a celebrity. Then they remember that not long before they had their own dreams of stardom.

So he disengages and looks for the next lady in waiting and the girlfriend disappears.
-Kate Casey

That says it all.

how sad

But is that his fault? He is upfront and clear on what he can emotional give. They agree. Then down the road of being together when the women feel comfortable, she changes the goal posts and start angling for something that was never going to be offered - especially when in then beginning, they were ok with that. Then they spilt and he has to go through another round of "will he ever settle down" and the "what is wrong with him for not wanting a wife and kids" articles and questions by the press. Why don't they write article about these women who fail to believe the limitations placed on the relationship? Who desperately trying to change him and the stupidity in trying to change anyone? Why don't we focus on the arrogrance of these women that makes them think they aloine will make him reverse his viewpoint? Or why these women willingly choose to be in a relationship with an emotional damaged man?

I get he is the famous one but why does he get continually battered about his choices.

clooney making too many women upset !!!!!

yep

why a man who says he makes movies that are personal to him chooses to shoot a movie about morality? People are just not buying it because George has none. I mean, He is talented. He might be polite, funny and intelligent (i truly question this last one). He is upfront about his personal choices. But, OMG... he doesn't talk about his personal life (cough!). I heard a saying that actions speak louder than words, non?! there you go! his actions speak louder that's why he doesn't talk about his personal life. He shows his personal life Or his personal life is a SHOW itself.

Yeah, he chooses women who are so in love with fame and the spotlight that is pathetic to watch. Sad indeed...

yep

watching wrote: But is that his fault? He is upfront and clear on what he can emotional give. They agree. Then down the road of being together when the women feel comfortable, she changes the goal posts and start angling for something that was never going to be offered - especially when in then beginning, they were ok with that. Then they spilt and he has to go through another round of "will he ever settle down" and the "what is wrong with him for not wanting a wife and kids" articles and questions by the press. Why don't they write article about these women who fail to believe the limitations placed on the relationship? Who desperately trying to change him and the stupidity in trying to change anyone? Why don't we focus on the arrogrance of these women that makes them think they aloine will make him reverse his viewpoint? Or why these women willingly choose to be in a relationship with an emotional damaged man?


I get he is the famous one but why does he get continually battered about his choices.

Don't think it's arrogance, they just lie to get him and try to be how he likes them.
After a while, without any good acting skills, the truth comes out about what they really want.

watching wrote: But is that his fault? He is upfront and clear on what he can emotional give. They agree. Then down the road of being together when the women feel comfortable, she changes the goal posts and start angling for something that was never going to be offered - especially when in then beginning, they were ok with that. Then they spilt and he has to go through another round of "will he ever settle down" and the "what is wrong with him for not wanting a wife and kids" articles and questions by the press. Why don't they write article about these women who fail to believe the limitations placed on the relationship? Who desperately trying to change him and the stupidity in trying to change anyone? Why don't we focus on the arrogrance of these women that makes them think they aloine will make him reverse his viewpoint? Or why these women willingly choose to be in a relationship with an emotional damaged man?

I get he is the famous one but why does he get continually battered about his choices.

You know when you start a relationship you do not know how it turns out, it may happen that after a short time runs out or that you fall in love fall in love seriously and if you try to change things and if that fails do the suitcases.

lelacorb wrote:You know when you start a relationship you do not know how it turns out, it may happen that after a short time runs out or that you fall in love fall in love seriously and if you try to change things and if that fails do the suitcases.

Lelacorb - but if you start a relationship with someone who tells you that he will never wed or give you children, you do know how that relationship will end if those things are important and of value to you. It is the most obvious case of a relationship ultimately having an expiration date.

And on a personal note, if I start a relationship with a man and he has clearly defined parmeters that he is willing to communicate, I respect them and until he tells me otherwise, I have no reason to believe that he has changed his viewpoint on those issues. Where it is about marriage, religion, focusing on his kids when he gets access whatever the custody arrangements, the need for time apart if he is required to travel for his job, etc. Once I know where he stands, I then, having all the relevant information, have the right to decide if I am willing to accept those terms and continue into a relationship with him. No-one is holding a gun to my head just because I may have developed feelings or a mad case of lust for some bloke. If I am not willing to accept his terms of what he can and cannot offer, then I choose not to have a relationship with him.

Contray to Hollywood's spate of romantic comedies, love does not conquer all. It doesn't change a commitment phobic into open, faithful loving boyfriend who want nothing more that to go to a farmer's market with you on the weekend and give you a foot rub when you get home.

If I meet some guy who states no marriage no kids ever and there is no room for debate on those topics - I won't get involved with him. Not because I desperately want marriage and kids but because I want the right and opportunity to be a part of the decision making process as to the direction of where we are headed as it directly impacts on my life as mich as it impacts on his. Doesn't mean his views are wrong as they suit his life and he may be justified to want what he wants. To me, it just means we aren't suited to each other and if we are honest about it from the outset, that gives both of us the opportunity to find our right fit with other people.

watching wrote:Lelacorb - but if you start a relationship with someone who tells you that he will never wed or give you children, you do know how that relationship will end if those things are important and of value to you.

Not necessarily. I think all of us know men who would 'never' settle down and have children and are now married fathers. People can and do change their mind about these things.

Of course, that does kind of depend on the couple being in love with each other and in a genuine relationship which is a situation I doubt has happened between George and any of his girlfriends.

Katie - good point. I should have thrown in "most likely".

"but if you start a relationship with someone who tells you that he will never wed or give you children, you do know how that relationship will most likely end if those things are important and of value to you."

When you meet someone you do not speak of marriage and children suffered at the beginning trying to figure out if you're good together. If at the beginning of a relationship the woman about marriage or children, I believe that there would be a married man. This is a discourse that can be done later when you are sure to feel good about the other person. I spent 4 years before we talk about children 3 years and then after I had already 2. Marriage told me about him, I avoided him like the plague!

I agree
when you meet someone you do not start speaking of marriage and children

but it's important to know wot both thinks
those are really serious issues

lelacorb wrote:When you meet someone you do not speak of marriage and children suffered at the beginning trying to figure out if you're good together. If at the beginning of a relationship the woman about marriage or children, I believe that there would be a married man. This is a discourse that can be done later when you are sure to feel good about the other person. I spent 4 years before we talk about children 3 years and then after I had already 2. Marriage told me about him, I avoided him like the plague!

Maybe you don't discuss marriage and kids in the first instance when you are in your twenties but when you are in your thirties, you talk about what you are looking for very early in the piece so you aren't wasting each other's time.

If, when you meet a man 30 years of marriage and children talking at once means that you do not try a man with whom to share your life a poor man to marry, but not to remain an old maid

Lelacorb - I did not say "at once". You don't meet a guy and after asking his name, ask for his viewpoint on marriage and kids - that would be nuts. Not on the first date or even in the first month unless it came up naturally in conversation. I said early "in the piece". Like before it becomes a relationship from a casual situation where you are getting to know the guy. Before you start planning a future with him. Before you become exclusive. Before you move in together. Before you meet his family.

Is it not prudent to know what the guy wants? Don't his wants and life plans matter as much as yours? Would you forgo all that you had wanted just to be with some guy? If someone absolutely wants to get married and have kids and that is their dream, that's not a wrong or bad ambition. But if that is want you want, you need to be honest about it and to be honest with the people you let in your life.

You wouldn't just fly by the seat of your pants in respect to your career, why would you do it in your personal life? Nothing wrong with wanting marriage and kids. Makes many people blissfully happy. Much like there is nothing wrong with not wanting it. That makes lots of people blissfully happy as well. It is one of the great things of life - choice. And the right to pursue what you believe will make you happy.

If you don't think it is right to have an open conversation about what you are hoping to achive in your life with someone you are considering entering into a relationship with (not just casually dating), that's your call. I just don't think most women over the age of 30 who have decided that marriage and kids are what they want, would actively get into a "relationship" without having the talk or at least having sussed out the situation. It is just not feasible when you look at the declining fertility numbers for women over the age of 35 as their options reduce each year to natural conceive and the risk of complication increases. IVF takes time, takes physical and emotionally toll on the couple, not to mention is expensive. Adoption is a long process that can take up to 5 years and has no guarantees.

Why invest emotionally in a relationship without discussing if you have similiar goals and desires. If you think wanting to have kids whilst in a long term committed relationship screams desperation to you, that is your issue, not mine. I would prefer to be in a secure relationship before I bring kids into the world. I would prefer to be with someone who shares my views and goals and wants to raise out kids together with the same values and morals. Maybe that is crazy to you. Not so much to me. But then, I guess our life experiences are just different.

It not about not wanted to be an old maid, it's about knowing yourself and not settling for just being in a relationship for the sake of it. You wouldn't be with a married man, you wouldn't be with an abuser - why is it so wrong to not want to be with a man who doesn't want kids if that is a desire that you have for your life? Some women knew in their teens that they wanted to be mothers. Should they forgo it? Should they not do something that they believe will bring them immense joy and personal satisfication? I would rather be told upfront as to where the guy stands so I can make an informed decision. If he isn't open to possibility of marriage & kids then I know the relationship (if it goes forward) will only be a casual one.

And the old maid comment is so stereotypical. I'm also not sure what to make of the "you do not try a man with whom to share your life" comment. For me, marriage is for life. Why would I settle? Why should anyone settle?

I guess mature people
(not talking about age)
have to talk about it
asap
with honesty

so not waste time

they are capital issues
in a life

watching wrote:You don't meet a guy and after asking his name, ask for his viewpoint on marriage and kids - that would be nuts.

Aah! So that's what I've been doing wrong all these years?

watching wrote:Lelacorb - I did not say "at once". You don't meet a guy and after asking his name, ask for his viewpoint on marriage and kids - that would be nuts. Not on the first date or even in the first month unless it came up naturally in conversation. I said early "in the piece". Like before it becomes a relationship from a casual situation where you are getting to know the guy. Before you start planning a future with him. Before you become exclusive. Before you move in together. Before you meet his family.

Is it not prudent to know what the guy wants? Don't his wants and life plans matter as much as yours? Would you forgo all that you had wanted just to be with some guy? If someone absolutely wants to get married and have kids and that is their dream, that's not a wrong or bad ambition. But if that is want you want, you need to be honest about it and to be honest with the people you let in your life.

You wouldn't just fly by the seat of your pants in respect to your career, why would you do it in your personal life? Nothing wrong with wanting marriage and kids. Makes many people blissfully happy. Much like there is nothing wrong with not wanting it. That makes lots of people blissfully happy as well. It is one of the great things of life - choice. And the right to pursue what you believe will make you happy.

If you don't think it is right to have an open conversation about what you are hoping to achive in your life with someone you are considering entering into a relationship with (not just casually dating), that's your call. I just don't think most women over the age of 30 who have decided that marriage and kids are what they want, would actively get into a "relationship" without having the talk or at least having sussed out the situation. It is just not feasible when you look at the declining fertility numbers for women over the age of 35 as their options reduce each year to natural conceive and the risk of complication increases. IVF takes time, takes physical and emotionally toll on the couple, not to mention is expensive. Adoption is a long process that can take up to 5 years and has no guarantees.

Why invest emotionally in a relationship without discussing if you have similiar goals and desires. If you think wanting to have kids whilst in a long term committed relationship screams desperation to you, that is your issue, not mine. I would prefer to be in a secure relationship before I bring kids into the world. I would prefer to be with someone who shares my views and goals and wants to raise out kids together with the same values and morals. Maybe that is crazy to you. Not so much to me. But then, I guess our life experiences are just different.

It not about not wanted to be an old maid, it's about knowing yourself and not settling for just being in a relationship for the sake of it. You wouldn't be with a married man, you wouldn't be with an abuser - why is it so wrong to not want to be with a man who doesn't want kids if that is a desire that you have for your life? Some women knew in their teens that they wanted to be mothers. Should they forgo it? Should they not do something that they believe will bring them immense joy and personal satisfication? I would rather be told upfront as to where the guy stands so I can make an informed decision. If he isn't open to possibility of marriage & kids then I know the relationship (if it goes forward) will only be a casual one.

And the old maid comment is so stereotypical. I'm also not sure what to make of the "you do not try a man with whom to share your life" comment. For me, marriage is for life. Why would I settle? Why should anyone settle?

I agree with what you write, I just wanted to say that sometimes happens to fall in love with a man and only then realize that he does not want responsibility. It's done, and let him suffer!

[quote="lelacorb

I agree with what you write, I just wanted to say that sometimes happens to fall in love with a man and only then realize that he does not want responsibility. It's done, and let him suffer![/quote]

Do I understand that you are saying that after you fall in love with a man, marry him and then find out then that he doesn't want that responsibility, you "let him suffer". Or do you find out, marry him and let him suffer.

If you find out before you are married, you would be insane to marry him and "let him suffer" because you would be relegating yourself to a Hell on Earth.